Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Slushy-Bellies Unite!

There's some funny business happening at our house.

Big has started having a dance party pretty often in our den after supper. Considering that he is the longest, stringiest, 7 year old that man has ever known, the sight of him throwing himself around the room, makes me almost wet my pants. We never let him think that we're laughing at him though. That would be devastating. It's better that he believes we're laughing out of pure entertainment. His choice in music is particularly interesting. It's instrumental and illogical. Don't worry. We've been video taping him. And the giggle in my belly that can't wait to release this video when he's 15 or at his wedding rehearsal dinner is a very excited but hushed one. Oh lord, it's gonna be good.

One of my earliest memories comes from when I was in pre-school. I'm guessing I was in the 3's or 4's class. I was sitting on the floor next to my teacher and she was wearing a short sleeved shirt. I was sitting on her left side and I obviously really liked this lady although I can't remember her name. I can however remember that because of her, I discovered what old lady arm fat was. And for a span of time on this one day, I made that fat jiggle. I can remember slapping it around and watching the ripples while the other kids were singing "Jesus Loves Me."

This memory came rushing back to me last night when I was in the shower with Lil'. She found my left-over-baby-weight-beer-slushy-belly and she turned it into a person. Who talked. And sang. And made faces. I guess that's the price you gotta pay for having a child with a wild imagination. But on the upside, it's just another reason why I shouldn't go on a diet! Who am I to take away Lil's shower friend? I can't be the one to stomp on her creativity.

Who would have guessed that the greatest lesson I would learn in pre-school would be to embrace the slushy-belly?

Slushy-bellies unite!

Sunday, November 14, 2010

The Goo and The Glop

When I was 19, there were several things that I said I'd never be when I became a mother.
I would never be the Mom at the beach pulling the wagon of ridiculousness behind her.
I would never be the Mom with the stickers stuck to the inside of her back windows in the car.
I would never be the Mom who yelled at her kids in public.
I would never be the Mom with the kid who's pants were too short.
I would never be the Mom with the carpet that had fingernail polish stains on it.

And well, here's the thing, I've become that Mom. Here's what I want to tell that 19 year old me who was reading "People" magazine and drinking a beer, judging that poor 34 year old me on the beach that day.

Look sweetie....

You bring along that wagon behind you because you'll do anything you can to stay at the beach for more than 2 hours when you have kids. You'll bring along snacks, towels, swim diapers and wipes. Toys, lotion, juice boxes and minnow nets. You're gonna need coozies and blankets, umbrellas and chairs. And you can say all you want to about how you want to keep it simple and your kids won't need that much but guess what? You won't and they will.

You let your kid put stickers on your car windows because you know what? It keeps them quiet for 1.1 seconds and it lets you jam out to that Tears for Fears song you haven't heard for years. Goo Gone can get rid of it with the help of a straight blade so just get over it already.

You're gonna yell. There's no doubt about it. The "Can I have it's" will come and they will get you. They will crawl up your back and into your ears and you'll take all you can until you just explode with a big fat "No!!!!" You'll turn around and see the 19 year old you looking at the 34 year old you with the stinkiest face and you'll want to flip her the bird. But you won't because you're a lady now.

You'll find out that these kids of yours grow like weeds after 3 days of rain. You won't be able to keep up and neither will your bank account. And that's how it happens. You'll send the Big one to church looking like the biggest dork you've ever seen but the 34 year old you won't really care that much because at least he brushed his teeth.

You're gonna learn the lesson of "give them an inch, they take a mile" real, real quick. What's that 19 year old me? Why do I let a 4 year old have nail polish in her room? Because, again, it keeps her quiet for 1.1 seconds and that's all the 34 year old me needs in life. Just a moment to catch a breath, take a sip, read a paragraph or fold a towel.

So you can sit there all you want and judge me and think about how you're gonna do it all different but you know what? You won't. You're gonna be all those things you said you'd never be. But then you'll be other things too that you thought you never could be. You're gonna learn what it's like to wear "your heart outside of your body." You're gonna sit and wonder and watch and plan and figure and hope. But it's not for yourself anymore. It's all for them.

Who will you be? Who will you love? Will they ever love you the way that I do? What will you do? Where will you live? How many grandbabies will you give me?

What will you grow? What will you build? What will you miss about being little?

The 34 year old me dreams about the 19 year old you but is drinking in every single second of the now, the present. The stickers, the nail polish, the goo and the glop.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Your Squeeks

Mmmmwaaaaaaa - I missed you and your squeeks.

Friday, November 5, 2010

A Catch

Grandma Mabel always had an aquarium when we were growing up. She was and still is the fish-whisperer. She had all kinds of stuff and it was so cool. She just caught her little critters in the creek outside her door and then they would live or jump out or...well, you get the picture.

Since we live at the beach, I wanted to let Big try to keep one of these too. My dream cast-net catch would be 1 sea-horse, 1 squid and 1 angel fish. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought we could possibly catch something that I believe is related to a mermaid.

Brace yourselves. This is magical.

That, my friends, is a catch.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010


Whenever I see this near our house, I know that fall is here. It's just a place that I pass on the way home where the marsh grows a glorious little patch of pink and if it's possible, makes my heart grow a little bit bigger for this place.